Dear Aggie: tricky relationships and iffy moves

Dear Aggie,

I don’t know how else to say this, but I may have feelings for a faculty or staff member. I see this person daily, and we have good talks.

We also interact outside of school sometimes and get pretty friendly. I don’t know if the feelings are mutual, but I know I have feelings.

Do you have any advice?

Sincerely, Why

Dear Why,

When it comes to love, being around somebody often enough can make you feel more affectionate toward that person. Before you fall too far down the rabbit hole, there are a couple of things to consider.

First of all, see whether you feel this way after not seeing the person for a while. If it fades away quickly, then it may just be a fleeting infatuation. If you cannot seem to shake this person from your psyche, then it gets trickier.

If you are a student or fellow faculty or staff member, there are a lot of potential risks to dating a staff member or professor – especially if you work directly with this person on a frequent basis.

The Employee Handbook says, “It is considered a serious breach of professional ethics for an employee to initiate or acquiesce in a sexual relationship with a student who is enrolled in a course being taught by the employee or whose academic work (including work as a teaching assistant) is being supervised by the employee.”

Two previous Dear Aggie posts addressed the ramifications of such a relationship occurring between staff and student. To restate, according to policy, it is ethically wrong for staff and student to engage in an extraprofessional relationship. For more details, view section 10.4 of the Employee Handbook at http://www.cameron.edu/policies.

Love is a complicated thing – especially if it happens within the walls of academia with someone you work with, work under or study under. You need to be aware of codes of conduct and things of the sort before pursuing anything. To report any violations, contact the Office of Equal Opportunity/Title IX at 580-581-6712 or tomr@cameron.edu

Sincerely, Aggie


Dear Aggie,

I am a transfer student, and this is my first semester at Cameron. Life here is much different than what I am used to.

Since I have just moved here, I am still adjusting to life in Oklahoma. However, I have noticed that it is not easy for someone from where I’m from.

Do you have any advice on how to fit in to life in Lawton, Oklahoma?

Sincerely, Homesick

Dear Homesick,

It is always a huge culture shock to go from one school to another. It can be even more difficult when you come to a place that is different than the home you are used to.

The first thing to remember is that you are not alone.

Between the number of international students and the number of students here from all over the United States, there is bound to be someone going through a similar dilemma as you are – even if they hail from a different place.

Look to one of your fellow students to help. Whether that student is from the Lawton area or someone experiencing the city for the first time, you are bound to find somebody who will take this journey of fitting in with you.

While many students may be slow to warm to somebody new, there are others who are more than happy to hang with you and help you get acclimated to college life.

Branch out as much as you can without causing heavy anxiety – you never know who you will find to help you fit in.

Sincerely, Aggie


Dear Aggie responses are generated in house by Collegian editorial members and do not represent professional opinion or advice. Tweet to @DearAggieCU, contact us by email dearaggiecu@gmail.com , or submit and anonymous message on the Dear Aggie Page.

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